My 1st wk, plus 1 day with MM


March 27, 2017

Hi MM’ers! Happy Monday! I have to tell you all about my 1st amazing week with MM.

I started on 3/19/17. Ended up doing 4 ABS that week, plus remaining 3 days by the book. I was amazed at myself! Then last nite, I knew I wanted to drink my wine, started with the measured glass before dinner. The hubster was cooking that nite. He had a little too many wines, I could see where the evening might be heading. Due to the alcohol I knew something might set him off and he would end up saying some not so very nice things to me. Which at times then makes me want to drink more, just to deal with. So, I tried the slowing down with the drinks to 1 per hour. But, didn’t make the hour. Only like 45 mins., then had another. Then 30 minsĀ  and another. All measured. Well, we had dinner. I tried to tred lightly with him, as not to set him off. Only 1 nasty comment. I dealt with it. I cleaned up dishes, he went to his chair, fell asleep immediately, which was good, so I didn’t have to deal with any more comments. Was able to switch to water for the rest of the evening. Was so proud of myself that I only had the 3 drinks. I couldn’t have done it without MM and reading all your posts! Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I know every week won’t be this easy. Especially getting together with friend’s, parties, etc. But I look forward to seeing if I can do it there also. I am sure there will be “slips”, but if there are, I feel I can pick myself up the next day, learn from the prior day and move on and try again. Thank you for being there. Have a good week.

4 comments on “My 1st wk, plus 1 day with MM
  1. Kary May Hickey says:

    Isn’t it amazing the difference one week can make? There’s a door opened with a whole new world out there! Who knew it? You should be very proud of yourself, we are.
    On a personal note, I, too, have a drinking spouse. Mine is a heavy drinker and, like you, I’ve become a damn good reader of the tiny nuances that forecast a downward turn. It’s not easy staying positive when this happens and it’s not easy to adhere to our own personal goals. I put off facing my drinking demons for many years to avoid the turmoil it was going to cause in my marriage, which only caused me to drink more and more. Finally, came down to saving myself, whether my marriage made it or not. I chose me.

    I’m still married, but it’s not easy. Sometimes I resent that alcohol still has some control over my life, even thought I no longer drink at all. But, then again, I’m letting it have the control it has, I always have the power to change that.

    No easy answers on the spousal front, but I salute you my sister-in-arms. We’ve been having several conversations about this very thing over on the MM forum lately. You’re more than welcome to join in.

    Thank you for sharing your experiences here, you’ve done a valuable service for others struggling with the same problems.

    • Gloria Morgan says:

      Thank you for your encouraging words! My late husband who died in 2004 had a severe drinking problem. Some days would start in the late am. I would be worried sick about him driving to work. So sick I suffered at my job. I will make this a short story. He ended up dying one nite when I was out. He started much earlier in the day. I came home found him on the bed choking on his vomit. Called 911. I tried reviving(this was not the 1st time something like this happened, several prior times to the hospital with him). Well, sadly they couldn’t save him. In some ways I know he is in a much better place. Not struggling daily with his demons. My point I guess is that you think I would have learned from this and not let myself get so carried away with my drinking. It has evolved more and more over time. Not at all during the day, but starts with a wine before cooking dinner, then goes nonstop throughout the evening.
      I am so happy to have found MM. I know it is not for everyone. I don’t think my late husband could have done it. My current husband I think maybe. I have told him about MM a little so far.
      Anyway, thank you for letting my get some of this off my chest. I would love to be able to help those that need help as I am being helped by others in MM. What a wonderful group to belong to. We need each other. We need each other to help us obtain the power and courage, strength to control our lives. It is good knowing you are out there for me! I salute you! God Bless.

  2. Emerald Lilly says:

    I just joined. Looking for an alternative to AA. Nothing on this site seems recwmt and I am already discouraged.

    • Kary May Hickey says:

      Hey there, Emerald Lilly, welcome to MM. Don’t be discouraged, this is MM’s public page where our members and others share their experiences with the public. Most of the back-and-forth communication-24/7- takes place over at our private communities, the MM forum and the MM listserv-you’ll find links for them and our website over at the top of the sidebar under the section: Looking for Support?” In our private communities, you’ll find lots of people who, just like you, were looking for alternatives to traditional abstinence based, 12 step programs. We respect these communities and know they are the answer for some people, but not all. MM has guidelines, but we don’t have requirements, instead we let our members figure out the best recovery path for themselves and we support them on that path. We offer support for both those who choose moderation and those who choose abstinence-sometimes attempting moderation leads to choosing abstinence, and sometimes those who have been abstinent for a while decided they’d like to try moderation-we’re there for anyone who wants to make a change in their drinking practices.
      I hope I see you over at one of our communities soon.
      Kary

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